WHY I WROTE POETRY

Even when I was as young as my twenties (and I'm over fifty now), I felt driven to write about my life. I'd already had experiences that some people will never match for emotional magnitude, at any age in their life. So I began to write a roman à clef. This petered out after a year or more of very regular attempts, subsequent revisions, and revisions of revisions. I suppose I realised that a person's first writing attempts, especially after a life leaning towards mathematics and sciences, should probably be much less ambitious than a novel of sorts, or an autobiography in effect. Then by 2000, I began to try writing poetry. I quickly enrolled on Manchester's Writers Bureau poetry course. This was a distance learning arrangement with no definite end, and it was enabled by the excellent tutor/poet, Alison Chisholm. I was very slow to get going; in fact ten years passed, with some large inner gaps, but ultimately I became highly prolific, and regularly published both nationally and internationally (on websites and in print anthologies.) Importantly though, many of my several hundred poems told the story that the roman à clef had tried to do, albeit in a fragmented or piecemeal manner of course. However, the story was separate from what I actually wanted to share to the world. Thus from around 2015 onward, my poems stopped being free or free verse in form and exhibiting a descriptive narrative message, and instead they became frankly psychological, at the same time "telling" rather than "showing", and with rigid structures. The number seven with its hints towards the notion of completion, was usually present in a direct or indirect way. But this was not a completion, and during the 2020 Coronavirus lockdown in the UK, I summarised all my thoughts and previous writing, in fact from back to the late nineties roman à clef, through my more descriptive poems, to the final psychological and mostly syllabic and very direct poems. I distilled two decades of writing into a nonfiction of just 42 pages long. It's a nonacademic, totally bare and very frank book. Later the same year I gave that work, called "I am" (subtitled "Conforming by nonconformity"), a powerful personal context. I prefixed to it a very brief, gigantically reduced autobiography, punctuated by poems from my preexisting ones in my "Complete verse." This ultimate work is still only 108 pages long, and is called "Embrace your aloneness."

Therefore, why I wrote poetry follows logically

It is because I knew I had something good and profitable to say to others, but I needed a couple of decades to crystalise it into its essence. During that time, poetry helped me to think out loud, make notes en route, and even share elements to people in open-mics (see for example the VIDEO page), on social media, and elsewhere. “The work is currently done, though I hope in time I'll both learn and share much more about life (of course.) Maybe I'll get to learn a totally new form of communication, beyond succinct words, perhaps with the greatest propensity for clarity, diversity in its reception, and maximum size of that reception. I don't think I’m describing music. I don't think it implies a god. It definitely requires discovery, and open-mindedness helps to facilitate that.